Betrayal stems from the latin word tradere: - to entrust loyalty to (same root where the word "tradition" originates). What? Wait a minute...

What I am pointing to here is at the root of any betrayal there was first an act of entrustment, a placing of faith in and loyalty to someone or something.

That someone may have been a parent, an adult, a friend, a business, a colleague, a boss, a church, a government, a doctor, a belief system even, a brother, sister, spouse or even your child. We create relationships of trust everywhere we are and where we plan to go.

The Middle English word bi-traien combined both bi- the suffix meaning "over" together with the old French "train" meaning to deceive, or prove treacherous and false defines the word betrayal. Betrayal is a cover up of the true intentions of someone - even when they are unconsciously carried out. This can be a hard aspect of betrayal to face - namely there was a part of us that over trusted, a blindspot (or many blindspots) that opened us up to being betrayed.

In the aftermath of betrayal we inevitably ask how this could have happened to us. We point to the iceberg above the water's surface and tell ourselves how deceived we were about what was underneath, the parts of the relationship we perhaps already knew deep down in ourselves were not trustworthy yet we entrusted ouusevesl to this course all the same.

Healing from betrayal is about unpacking what happened; accepting we are 100% responsible for our reality; that in this reality we can make a new choice, and committ to take action in this.

The more complex or deep the betrayal the more to unpack and the more transformative its potential and healing can free you to live a more authentic life.

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